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Public Fight Report

(Bantamweight) Joe "Satch" Satriani defeated CUBS WIN!! by knockout (KO) in round 8.

Match Tuesday, April 6, 2021

In this corner, standing 4 feet and 10 inches (147 centimeters) tall weighing in at 112 pounds (51 kilograms) is CUBS WIN!!!!

In this corner, standing 4 feet and 5 inches (135 centimeters) tall weighing in at 118 pounds (54 kilograms) is Joe "Satch" Satriani!!

The referee for this bout will be Richard Steele.

ROUND 1

Win!! tries to cut off the ring. (cutting off the ring)
Satch clinches when his opponent closes. (clinching)

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Win!! tries to attack, but Satch hangs on until the referee separates them.
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+Win!! solidly lands a barrage of powerful punches to the face.
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+Win!! annoys Satch with a volley of punches to the temple. Satch grimaces in pain.
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Win!! tries to attack, but Satch hangs on until the referee separates them.
+Win!! thumps Satch with a pair of vicious punches to the head!
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+Satch belts Win!! with a barrage of quick shots to the solar plexus.
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+Win!! belts Satch with a straight right to the chin!
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+Satch lands a heavy straight right to the solar plexus.
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-Win!! fires a jab to the face, but Satch blocks.
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Win!! tries to attack, but Satch hangs on until the referee separates them.
Win!! tries to attack, but Satch hangs on until the referee separates them.
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Win!! tries to attack, but Satch hangs on until the referee separates them.
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-Satch fires a flurry of left punches to the chest, but Win!! takes it in the forearms.
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Win!! tries to attack, but Satch hangs on until the referee separates them.

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BELL

According to the commentator:

CUBS WIN!! landed 19 of 34 punches, and Joe "Satch" Satriani landed 15 of 27 punches.

CUBS WIN!! won the round 10-9

CUBS WIN!! is winning the fight 10-9


Win!! doesn't even want to rest!

Satch doesn't even want to rest! He has minor cut below the left eye.



ROUND 2

Win!! tries to cut off the ring. (cutting off the ring)
Satch clinches when his opponent closes. (clinching)

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+Win!! hits with a series of painful combinations to the face. Satch shakes his head to clear it.
+Satch fires a volley of stiff shots to the ribs.
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Win!! tries to attack, but Satch hangs on until the referee separates them.
-Win!! attacks with a flurry of punches to the head, but Satch beats a hasty retreat.
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+Satch smacks Win!! with a series of off balance combinations to the chest!
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+Win!! whacks Satch with a flurry of heavy combinations to the head!!
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Win!! tries to attack, but Satch hangs on until the referee separates them.
-Satch launches a right hook to the ribs, but Win!! quickly backs away.
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Win!! tries to attack, but Satch hangs on until the referee separates them.
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Win!! tries to attack, but Satch hangs on until the referee separates them.
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Win!! tries to attack, but Satch hangs on until the referee separates them.

-Satch paws a right to the solar plexus, but misses.
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Win!! tries to attack, but Satch hangs on until the referee separates them.
-Satch attempts a barrage of blows to the stomach, but Win!! deftly avoits it.
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+Win!! hits with a series of blows to the mouth.
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BELL

According to the commentator:

CUBS WIN!! landed 20 of 31 punches, and Joe "Satch" Satriani landed 11 of 23 punches.

CUBS WIN!! won the round 10-9

CUBS WIN!! is winning the fight 20-18


Win!! remains standing while the trainer wipes him down.

Satch doesn't even want to rest! He has minor cut below the left eye.



ROUND 3

Win!! tries to cut off the ring. (cutting off the ring)
Satch clinches when his opponent closes. (clinching)

Win!! tries to attack, but Satch hangs on until the referee separates them.

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+Win!! lands a furious jab to the mouth!! Satch ignores it.
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Win!! tries to attack, but Satch hangs on until the referee separates them.
Win!! tries to attack, but Satch hangs on until the referee separates them.
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+Satch hits Win!! with a series of nice shots to the chest.
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Win!! tries to attack, but Satch hangs on until the referee separates them.
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Win!! tries to attack, but Satch hangs on until the referee separates them.
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-Satch paws a barrage of shots to the stomach, but he's too slow.
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+Win!! tosses a pair of furious shots to the head.
Win!! tries to attack, but Satch hangs on until the referee separates them.

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+Win!! belts Satch with a pair of wild combinations to the chin. Satch doesn't seem bothered.
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+Win!! throws a volley of strong combinations to the face.
+Satch fires a pair of blows to the solar plexus.
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BELL

According to the commentator:

CUBS WIN!! landed 19 of 31 punches, and Joe "Satch" Satriani landed 12 of 25 punches.

Joe "Satch" Satriani won the round 10-9

CUBS WIN!! is winning the fight 29-28


Win!! grabs a water bottle and rests on his stool.

Satch remains standing while the trainer wipes him down. He has minor cut below the left eye.



ROUND 4

Win!! tries to cut off the ring. (cutting off the ring)
Satch clinches when his opponent closes. (clinching)

-Win!! probes with a pair of right punches to the eye, but falls short.
+Win!! attacks with a off balance combination to the jaw.
Win!! tries to attack, but Satch hangs on until the referee separates them.
+Satch lashes out with a flurry of hard blows to the stomach.
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Win!! tries to attack, but Satch hangs on until the referee separates them.
+Satch hits with a flurry of shots to the solar plexus.
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+Win!! pops Satch with a pair of painful combinations to the mouth. Satch sneers "Is that the best you can do?"
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-Satch paws a barrage of left combinations to the solar plexus, but Win!! covers himself well.
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Win!! tries to attack, but Satch hangs on until the referee separates them.
-Satch fires a flurry of left blows to the chest, but to no avail.
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-Win!! paws a pair of left punches to the chin, but Satch steps aside.
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Win!! tries to attack, but Satch hangs on until the referee separates them.
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-Win!! charges with a jab to the temple, but Satch ducks just in time.
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BELL

According to the commentator:

CUBS WIN!! landed 17 of 30 punches, and Joe "Satch" Satriani landed 11 of 24 punches.

Joe "Satch" Satriani won the round 10-9

This fight is too close to call.


Win!! is obviously tired.

Satch remains standing while the trainer wipes him down. He has minor cut below the left eye.



ROUND 5

Win!! tries to cut off the ring. (cutting off the ring)
Satch clinches when his opponent closes. (clinching)

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+Satch smacks Win!! with a volley of stinging combinations to the chest.
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-Win!! attacks with a volley of blows to the eye, but Satch quickly backs away.
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+Win!! throws a heavy roundhouse to the nose.
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+Satch throws a barrage of mean punches to the stomach. Win!! falls against the ropes!
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Win!! tries to attack, but Satch hangs on until the referee separates them.
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-Win!! tries a pair of right combinations to the jaw, but to no avail.
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+Win!! lands a flurry of punches to the eye!
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-Satch lunges with a flurry of right punches to the stomach, but misses completely.
Win!! tries to attack, but Satch hangs on until the referee separates them.

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Win!! tries to attack, but Satch hangs on until the referee separates them.
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Win!! tries to attack, but Satch hangs on until the referee separates them.
-Satch paws a pair of shots to the chest, but Win!! stays away from it.
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+Win!! suprises Satch with a stiff jab to the chin!
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Win!! tries to attack, but Satch hangs on until the referee separates them.
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BELL

According to the commentator:

CUBS WIN!! landed 16 of 33 punches, and Joe "Satch" Satriani landed 11 of 23 punches.

Joe "Satch" Satriani won the round 10-9

Joe "Satch" Satriani is winning the fight 48-47


Win!! is slowing down.

Satch remains standing while the trainer wipes him down. He has minor cut below the left eye.



ROUND 6

Win!! is using the ring. (using the ring)
Satch clinches when his opponent closes. (clinching)

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-Win!! attempts a volley of punches to the face, but goes wide.
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Win!! tries to attack, but Satch hangs on until the referee separates them.

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Win!! tries to attack, but Satch hangs on until the referee separates them.
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+Win!! throws a barrage of furious shots to the jaw.
+Satch pops Win!! with a flurry of blows to the stomach. Win!! quickly recovers.
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+Satch smashes Win!! with a flurry of commanding punches to the solar plexus.
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Win!! tries to attack, but Satch hangs on until the referee separates them.
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-Win!! throws a left jab to the eye, but loses his balance.
+Win!! fires a flurry of nice punches to the mouth!
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-Win!! lunges with a pair of punches to the face, but fails to score.
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-Satch probes with a barrage of punches to the stomach, but Win!! covers himself well.
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Win!! tries to attack, but Satch hangs on until the referee separates them.
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+Win!! backs up Satch with a series of shots to the head.
Win!! tries to attack, but Satch hangs on until the referee separates them.
-Satch fires a pair of right shots to the stomach, but comes up empty.
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BELL

According to the commentator:

CUBS WIN!! landed 17 of 43 punches, and Joe "Satch" Satriani landed 14 of 23 punches.

Joe "Satch" Satriani won the round 10-9

Joe "Satch" Satriani is winning the fight 58-56


Win!! looks exhausted.

Satch grabs a water bottle and rests on his stool. He has minor cut below the left eye.



ROUND 7

Win!! is using the ring. (using the ring)
Satch clinches when his opponent closes. (clinching)

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+Satch jolts Win!! with a series of vicious punches to the chest. Win!! sneers "My grandmother can hit harder than that!"
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+Win!! lands a flurry of punches to the face. Satch covers up.
Win!! tries to attack, but Satch hangs on until the referee separates them.

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Win!! tries to attack, but Satch hangs on until the referee separates them.
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-Satch throws a barrage of blows to the stomach, but to no avail.
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-Satch attempts a flurry of blows to the ribs, but Win!! hides behind his gloves.
+Win!! wallops Satch with a barrage of commanding punches to the chin!!
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-Win!! fires a flurry of punches to the face, but Satch backs out of it.
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-Win!! tries a right jab to the eye, but Satch narrowly avoids it
-Win!! tries to land a volley of left punches to the mouth, but Satch steps aside and laughs.
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-Win!! tries to land a flurry of right punches to the eye, but he's too slow.
+Satch wakes up the fans with a pair of wild punches to the stomach.
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Win!! tries to attack, but Satch hangs on until the referee separates them.
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Win!! tries to attack, but Satch hangs on until the referee separates them.
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Win!! tries to attack, but Satch hangs on until the referee separates them.
+Win!! tattoos Satch with a flurry of punches to the head. Satch beats a hasty retreat.
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BELL

According to the commentator:

CUBS WIN!! landed 16 of 42 punches, and Joe "Satch" Satriani landed 13 of 27 punches.

Joe "Satch" Satriani won the round 10-9

Joe "Satch" Satriani is winning the fight 68-65


Win!! receives medical attention from his trainer.

Satch grabs a water bottle and rests on his stool. He has minor cut below the left eye.



ROUND 8

Win!! is using the ring. (using the ring)
Satch fights inside. (inside)

+Satch fires a series of powerful punches to the chin. Win!! hangs on until the referee breaks them up.
Satch lands a slow motion haymaker and Win!! staggers. He reaches for the ropes ... and misses -- Flop!!

ONE

TWO

THREE

FOUR

FIVE

SIX
Win!! struggles to his feet and the fight goes on.
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-Win!! probes with a pair of right punches to the mouth, but he's too slow.
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+Win!! fires a barrage of solid punches to the head!
-Satch lunges with a flurry of right blows to the nose, but Win!! hides behind his gloves.
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+Satch hits with a barrage of punches to the temple. Win!! laughs!
Satch lands a cruel blow to the head and Win!! goes down!!

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TWO

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FOUR

FIVE

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SEVEN

EIGHT

NINE

TEN
He's Out!
Joe "Satch" Satriani wins by a Knock Out!!

BELL
Win!! can't remember which corner is his. He has swelling above the right eye.

Satch grabs a water bottle and rests on his stool. He has serious cut above the left eye. He has minor cut below the left eye.






Judge Guimond had the fight scored as follows:

Round 1: CUBS WIN!! 10-9
Round 2: CUBS WIN!! 10-9
Round 3: Joe "Satch" Satriani 10-9
Round 4: CUBS WIN!! 10-9
Round 5: Joe "Satch" Satriani 10-9
Round 6: Joe "Satch" Satriani 10-9
Round 7: Joe "Satch" Satriani 10-9


Judge Leinbach had the fight scored as follows:

Round 1: CUBS WIN!! 10-9
Round 2: CUBS WIN!! 10-9
Round 3: CUBS WIN!! 10-9
Round 4: Joe "Satch" Satriani 10-9
Round 5: Joe "Satch" Satriani 10-9
Round 6: Joe "Satch" Satriani 10-9
Round 7: Joe "Satch" Satriani 10-9


Christy Martin had the fight scored as follows:

Round 1: CUBS WIN!! 10-9
Round 2: CUBS WIN!! 10-9
Round 3: Joe "Satch" Satriani 10-9
Round 4: CUBS WIN!! 10-9
Round 5: Joe "Satch" Satriani 10-9
Round 6: Joe "Satch" Satriani 10-9
Round 7: Joe "Satch" Satriani 10-9

Joe "Satch" Satriani wins by a knockout!