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Public Fight Report

(Strawweight) Army of Dorkness 1 defeated Joe Byrd X by technical knockout (TKO) in round 10.

Match Monday, May 13, 2019

In this corner, standing 4 feet and 5 inches (135 centimeters) tall weighing in at 95 pounds (43 kilograms) is Army of Dorkness 1!!

In this corner, standing 4 feet and 6 inches (137 centimeters) tall weighing in at 104 pounds (47 kilograms) is Joe Byrd X!!

The referee for this bout will be Mitch Halpern.

ROUND 1

Dorkness 1 tries to cut off the ring. (cutting off the ring)
Byrd X clinches when his opponent closes. (clinching)

+Byrd X strikes with a volley of furious punches to the nose.
...
+Dorkness 1 jolts Byrd X with a series of solid blows to the head.
Dorkness 1 lands a vicious left blow to the temple and Byrd X is flattened!!

ONE

TWO

THREE

FOUR

FIVE

SIX

SEVEN
Byrd X struggles to his feet and the fight goes on.
+Dorkness 1 scores with a jab to the mouth.
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+Byrd X connects with a volley of furious blows to the chin.
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Dorkness 1 tries to attack, but Byrd X hangs on until the referee separates them.
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+Byrd X solidly lands a commanding roundhouse to the face! Dorkness 1 doesn't notice.
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Dorkness 1 tries to attack, but Byrd X hangs on until the referee separates them.
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Dorkness 1 tries to attack, but Byrd X hangs on until the referee separates them.
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+Dorkness 1 tosses a series of quick combinations to the temple!! Byrd X ignores it.
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+Dorkness 1 wallops Byrd X with a blow to the groin! This is terrible!
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Dorkness 1 tries to attack, but Byrd X hangs on until the referee separates them.
+Dorkness 1 smacks Byrd X with a series of stiff shots to the mouth.
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+Byrd X rocks Dorkness 1 with a left to the temple.
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+Dorkness 1 stuns Byrd X with a glancing straight right to the chin.
+Byrd X clocks Dorkness 1 with a volley of hard shots to the chin. Dorkness 1 falls against the ropes!
...
The fighters start chatting with members of the press.
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Dorkness 1 tries to attack, but Byrd X hangs on until the referee separates them.

+Dorkness 1 drills Byrd X with a flurry of combinations to the mouth. Byrd X laughs!
Dorkness 1 lands a lightning blow to the head and Byrd X's knees buckle -- he topples to the canvas!!

ONE

TWO

THREE

FOUR

FIVE

SIX

SEVEN

EIGHT
Byrd X struggles to his feet and the fight goes on.
+Byrd X wallops Dorkness 1 with a barrage of punches to the chin. Dorkness 1 sneers "My little sister can hit harder than you!"
+Dorkness 1 takes charge with a volley of combinations to the chin.
...
...
...
...

BELL

According to the commentator:

Army of Dorkness 1 landed 26 of 31 punches, and Joe Byrd X landed 24 of 24 punches.

Army of Dorkness 1 won the round 10-7

Army of Dorkness 1 is winning the fight 10-7


Dorkness 1 doesn't even want to rest! He has minor cut below the right eye.

Byrd X doesn't even want to rest!



ROUND 2

Dorkness 1 tries to cut off the ring. (cutting off the ring)
Byrd X clinches when his opponent closes. (clinching)

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+Dorkness 1 hits Byrd X with a wild jab to the ribs. Byrd X sneers "My little sister can hit harder than you!"
+ The fighters exchange punches to the jaw.
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Dorkness 1 tries to attack, but Byrd X hangs on until the referee separates them.
Dorkness 1 tries to attack, but Byrd X hangs on until the referee separates them.
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Dorkness 1 tries to attack, but Byrd X hangs on until the referee separates them.
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-Dorkness 1 tries to land a barrage of blows to the solar plexus, but Byrd X blocks.
+Dorkness 1 smashes Byrd X with a flurry of stiff punches to the solar plexus. Byrd X beats a hasty retreat.
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Dorkness 1 tries to attack, but Byrd X hangs on until the referee separates them.
+Byrd X suprises Dorkness 1 with a flurry of punches to the stomach.
+Dorkness 1 rocks Byrd X with a straight right to the chest.
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+Dorkness 1 nails Byrd X with a bite to the ear! This is terrible!
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+Byrd X throws a series of shots to the stomach!
+Byrd X hits with a flurry of punches to the ribs.
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+Dorkness 1 grazes Byrd X with a volley of combinations to the chest.
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+Byrd X fires a flurry of commanding combinations to the chest!!
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BELL

According to the commentator:

Army of Dorkness 1 landed 19 of 24 punches, and Joe Byrd X landed 23 of 23 punches.

Army of Dorkness 1 won the round 10-9

Army of Dorkness 1 is winning the fight 20-16


Dorkness 1 remains standing while the trainer wipes him down. He has minor cut below the right eye.

Byrd X remains standing while the trainer wipes him down.



ROUND 3

Dorkness 1 tries to cut off the ring. (cutting off the ring)
Byrd X clinches when his opponent closes. (clinching)

Dorkness 1 tries to attack, but Byrd X hangs on until the referee separates them.
...
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-Byrd X fires a right sweeping right to the solar plexus, but Dorkness 1 beats a hasty retreat.
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-Dorkness 1 probes with a series of right punches to the ribs, but Byrd X beats a hasty retreat.
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+Byrd X wallops Dorkness 1 with a powerful left to the solar plexus.
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Dorkness 1 tries to attack, but Byrd X hangs on until the referee separates them.
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+Dorkness 1 clocks Byrd X with a series of off balance punches to the solar plexus.
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+Dorkness 1 pounds Byrd X with a flurry of hard combinations to the ribs.
Dorkness 1 tries to attack, but Byrd X hangs on until the referee separates them.
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+Dorkness 1 clocks Byrd X with an illegal rabbit punch! The referee sees it and issues a warning!
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Dorkness 1 tries to attack, but Byrd X hangs on until the referee separates them.
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+ The fighters trade combinations to the face.
+Dorkness 1 solidly lands a series of combinations to the ribs.
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+Byrd X hammers Dorkness 1 with a series of nasty blows to the chest.
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+Byrd X hits with a pair of blows to the ribs.
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BELL

According to the commentator:

Army of Dorkness 1 landed 19 of 22 punches, and Joe Byrd X landed 17 of 25 punches.

Army of Dorkness 1 won the round 10-9

Army of Dorkness 1 is winning the fight 30-25


Dorkness 1 remains standing while the trainer wipes him down. He has minor cut below the right eye.

Byrd X grabs a water bottle and rests on his stool.



ROUND 4

Dorkness 1 tries to cut off the ring. (cutting off the ring)
Byrd X clinches when his opponent closes. (clinching)

...
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-Byrd X attempts a volley of blows to the solar plexus, but Dorkness 1 narrowly avoids it
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Dorkness 1 tries to attack, but Byrd X hangs on until the referee separates them.
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+Byrd X hurts Dorkness 1 with a volley of blows to the solar plexus.
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-Dorkness 1 throws a volley of combinations to the chest, but taps his opponent ineffectively.
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+Dorkness 1 tosses a series of heavy punches to the solar plexus.
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+Byrd X jolts Dorkness 1 with a volley of nasty combinations to the chest. Dorkness 1 retreats to the far corner.
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+Dorkness 1 stuns Byrd X with a flurry of punches to the stomach.
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+Byrd X pokes Dorkness 1 with a flurry of vicious shots to the solar plexus.
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+Dorkness 1 smashes Byrd X with a pair of vicious punches to the solar plexus.
Dorkness 1 tries to attack, but Byrd X hangs on until the referee separates them.
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Dorkness 1 tries to attack, but Byrd X hangs on until the referee separates them.
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Dorkness 1 tries to attack, but Byrd X hangs on until the referee separates them.
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BELL

According to the commentator:

Army of Dorkness 1 landed 17 of 25 punches, and Joe Byrd X landed 15 of 23 punches.

Army of Dorkness 1 won the round 10-9

Army of Dorkness 1 is winning the fight 40-34


Dorkness 1 grabs a water bottle and rests on his stool. He has minor cut below the right eye.

Byrd X is obviously tired.



ROUND 5

Dorkness 1 tries to cut off the ring. (cutting off the ring)
Byrd X clinches when his opponent closes. (clinching)

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-Byrd X probes with a barrage of punches to the ribs, but only hits air.
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Dorkness 1 tries to attack, but Byrd X hangs on until the referee separates them.
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-Dorkness 1 tries to land a left to the ribs, but flails uselessly.
Dorkness 1 tries to attack, but Byrd X hangs on until the referee separates them.
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+Dorkness 1 takes charge with a pair of off balance punches to the ribs.
+Byrd X lashes out with a volley of shots to the solar plexus. Dorkness 1 doesn't notice.
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Dorkness 1 tries to attack, but Byrd X hangs on until the referee separates them.
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+Byrd X tattoos Dorkness 1 with a volley of glancing shots to the chest. Dorkness 1 is hurt!
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+Dorkness 1 backs up Byrd X with a volley of stinging blows to the stomach!!
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+Byrd X backs up Dorkness 1 with a volley of punches to the solar plexus.
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Dorkness 1 tries to attack, but Byrd X hangs on until the referee separates them.
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BELL

According to the commentator:

Army of Dorkness 1 landed 16 of 24 punches, and Joe Byrd X landed 15 of 25 punches.

Army of Dorkness 1 won the round 10-9

Army of Dorkness 1 is winning the fight 50-43


Dorkness 1 grabs a water bottle and rests on his stool. He has minor cut below the right eye.

Byrd X is obviously tired.



ROUND 6

Dorkness 1 tries to cut off the ring. (cutting off the ring)
Byrd X clinches when his opponent closes. (clinching)

...
Dorkness 1 tries to attack, but Byrd X hangs on until the referee separates them.
+Byrd X wakes up the fans with a pair of loud blows to the solar plexus. Dorkness 1 retreats to the far corner.
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+Dorkness 1 throws a volley of punches to the chest.
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+Dorkness 1 thumps Byrd X with a series of combinations to the solar plexus.
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+Byrd X hammers Dorkness 1 with a blow to the groin! The referee sees it and issues a warning!
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+Byrd X tosses a pair of heavy blows to the ribs!
-Byrd X paws a barrage of shots to the ribs, but Dorkness 1 leaps aside.
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-Byrd X probes with a barrage of blows to the chest, but Dorkness 1 leaps aside.
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+Byrd X hits with a powerful jab to the ribs.
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Dorkness 1 tries to attack, but Byrd X hangs on until the referee separates them.
+Dorkness 1 pokes Byrd X with a series of vicious combinations to the chest.
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Dorkness 1 tries to attack, but Byrd X hangs on until the referee separates them.
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Dorkness 1 tries to attack, but Byrd X hangs on until the referee separates them.

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-Byrd X attempts a volley of punches to the stomach, but Dorkness 1 quickly backs away.
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BELL

According to the commentator:

Army of Dorkness 1 landed 18 of 23 punches, and Joe Byrd X landed 19 of 33 punches.

Army of Dorkness 1 won the round 10-9

Army of Dorkness 1 is winning the fight 60-52


Dorkness 1 grabs a water bottle and rests on his stool. He has minor cut below the right eye.

Byrd X is slowing down.



ROUND 7

Dorkness 1 tries to cut off the ring. (cutting off the ring)
Byrd X clinches when his opponent closes. (clinching)

...
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Dorkness 1 tries to attack, but Byrd X hangs on until the referee separates them.
+Byrd X throws a series of punches to the stomach.
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+Dorkness 1 thumps Byrd X with a flurry of punches to the ribs. Byrd X covers up.
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+Byrd X hits Dorkness 1 with a uppercut to the ribs.
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Dorkness 1 tries to attack, but Byrd X hangs on until the referee separates them.
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+Dorkness 1 pummels Byrd X with a series of wild combinations to the chest!
+ The fighters exchange punches to the temple.
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-Byrd X attempts a series of left shots to the stomach, but Dorkness 1 deftly avoits it.
+Byrd X hammers Dorkness 1 with a series of punches to the solar plexus!! Dorkness 1 is hurt!
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Dorkness 1 tries to attack, but Byrd X hangs on until the referee separates them.
+Dorkness 1 backs up Byrd X with a volley of combinations to the chest. Byrd X gets mad!
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-Byrd X probes with a cross to the solar plexus, but Dorkness 1 ties him up.
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+Byrd X tosses a uppercut to the solar plexus. Dorkness 1 quickly recovers.
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BELL

According to the commentator:

Army of Dorkness 1 landed 19 of 24 punches, and Joe Byrd X landed 19 of 32 punches.

Army of Dorkness 1 won the round 10-9

Army of Dorkness 1 is winning the fight 70-61


Dorkness 1 is obviously tired. He has minor cut below the right eye.

Byrd X looks exhausted.



ROUND 8

Dorkness 1 tries to cut off the ring. (cutting off the ring)
Byrd X grabs his opponent and pounds him. (clinching)

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Dorkness 1 tries to attack, but Byrd X hangs on until the referee separates them.
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+Dorkness 1 lands a barrage of combinations to the stomach.
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+Dorkness 1 hits Byrd X with a pair of hard combinations to the solar plexus!!
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+Dorkness 1 jolts Byrd X with a volley of combinations to the stomach.
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+Byrd X grazes Dorkness 1 with a flurry of vicious combinations to the eye.
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-Byrd X charges with a barrage of combinations to the eye, but Dorkness 1 blocks.
+Byrd X jars Dorkness 1 with a pair of shots to the mouth. Dorkness 1 quickly recovers.
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Dorkness 1 tries to attack, but Byrd X hangs on until the referee separates them.
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-Byrd X attempts a uppercut to the nose, but goes wide.
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+Byrd X annoys Dorkness 1 with a pair of strong blows to the jaw.
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+Dorkness 1 lands a pair of strong combinations to the stomach.
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BELL

According to the commentator:

Army of Dorkness 1 landed 24 of 24 punches, and Joe Byrd X landed 16 of 36 punches.

Army of Dorkness 1 won the round 10-9

Army of Dorkness 1 is winning the fight 80-70


Dorkness 1 is obviously tired. He has minor cut below the right eye. He has cut below the left eye.

Byrd X collapses limply onto his stool.



ROUND 9

Dorkness 1 is using the ring. (using the ring)
Byrd X grabs his opponent and pounds him. (clinching)

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+Dorkness 1 pokes Byrd X with a pair of punches to the stomach.
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+Dorkness 1 fires a flurry of vicious punches to the solar plexus.
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Dorkness 1 tries to attack, but Byrd X hangs on until the referee separates them.
+Byrd X stuns Dorkness 1 with a barrage of hard punches to the temple.
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-Byrd X charges with a flurry of punches to the head, but Dorkness 1 beats a hasty retreat.
Dorkness 1 tries to attack, but Byrd X hangs on until the referee separates them.
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+Dorkness 1 tattoos Byrd X with a volley of nice punches to the solar plexus. Byrd X sneers "My little sister can hit harder than you!"
-Byrd X paws a series of punches to the temple, but to no avail.
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+Dorkness 1 thumps Byrd X with a series of glancing punches to the solar plexus.
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-Byrd X lashes out with a flurry of punches to the mouth, but Dorkness 1 escapes.
-Byrd X lunges with a volley of punches to the eye, but Dorkness 1 stays away from it.
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+Dorkness 1 hammers Byrd X with a series of powerful blows to the ribs. Byrd X retreats to the far corner.
+Dorkness 1 annoys Byrd X with a barrage of punches to the solar plexus! Byrd X laughs!
...

BELL

According to the commentator:

Army of Dorkness 1 landed 32 of 32 punches, and Joe Byrd X landed 14 of 31 punches.

Army of Dorkness 1 won the round 10-9

Army of Dorkness 1 is winning the fight 90-79


Dorkness 1 is obviously tired. He has minor cut below the right eye. He has cut below the left eye.

Byrd X can't remember which corner is his.



ROUND 10

Dorkness 1 is using the ring. (using the ring)
Byrd X grabs his opponent and pounds him. (clinching)

...
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-Byrd X attempts a pair of right punches to the temple, but flails uselessly.
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+Dorkness 1 pops Byrd X with a volley of punches to the stomach. Dorkness 1 strikes, and hits again, and again, and again .. Byrd X's arms hang limply at his sides. The Referee stops the fight!
Army of Dorkness 1 wins by a Knock Out!!

BELL
Dorkness 1 grabs a water bottle and rests on his stool. He has minor cut below the right eye. He has cut below the left eye.

Byrd X can't remember which corner is his. He has swelling above the right eye.






Judge Guimond had the fight scored as follows:

Round 1: Army of Dorkness 1 10-7
Round 2: Army of Dorkness 1 10-9
Round 3: Army of Dorkness 1 10-9
Round 4: Army of Dorkness 1 10-9
Round 5: Army of Dorkness 1 10-9
Round 6: Army of Dorkness 1 10-9
Round 7: Army of Dorkness 1 10-9
Round 8: Army of Dorkness 1 10-9
Round 9: Army of Dorkness 1 10-9


Judge Leinbach had the fight scored as follows:

Round 1: Army of Dorkness 1 10-7
Round 2: Army of Dorkness 1 10-9
Round 3: Army of Dorkness 1 10-9
Round 4: Army of Dorkness 1 10-9
Round 5: Army of Dorkness 1 10-9
Round 6: Army of Dorkness 1 10-9
Round 7: Army of Dorkness 1 10-9
Round 8: Army of Dorkness 1 10-9
Round 9: Army of Dorkness 1 10-9


Sean O'Grady had the fight scored as follows:

Round 1: Army of Dorkness 1 10-7
Round 2: Army of Dorkness 1 10-9
Round 3: Army of Dorkness 1 10-9
Round 4: Army of Dorkness 1 10-9
Round 5: Army of Dorkness 1 10-9
Round 6: Army of Dorkness 1 10-9
Round 7: Army of Dorkness 1 10-9
Round 8: Army of Dorkness 1 10-9
Round 9: Army of Dorkness 1 10-9

Army of Dorkness 1 wins by a technical knockout!